Ho! Ho! Ho!

It’s becoming pretty obvious. I catch more and more small children looking at me with a great deal of interest these days. I think it’s the beard and the belly. You know, like the waitress at the café in Salado who said, “Hon, with your beard and your belly you can play Santa Claus!” I won’t tell you what I told her about her tip! But she’s right. Every time we are out somewhere, I catch some wide-eyed child really checking me out.

Even Grace. Mom was reading her a Christmas book when were up there and the last page had a picture of the jolly gent himself. Grace looked at the picture, then she looked up at me; she looked back at the picture and then she pointed at me!

I have even begun going “Ho, Ho, Ho” to some of the kids. Sometimes I want to say “I’m keeping a list – and you’re on it!” The other day in Central Market a kid was really acting up – so much so that other store patrons around him were commenting about his behavior. I really wanted to go up to the kid, point at my beard and say, “Do you know who I am? Do you know that I check up on naughty children?” But judging from the mom’s yuppie attire (and lack of restraint of her bratty kid) she probably would have sued me for perpetuating a myth and traumatizing her little dear.

The other day a friend called and asked me if I wanted a gig playing Santa at a bank opening – two six-hour Saturdays dandling kiddos in a hot Santa suit. I was so sorry that we were going to be in Fort Worth one Saturday and anywhere else I could think of the next.

P.S. Mom just came in from shopping with... a Santa Hat for me. Anybody got a red suit?