Reflections when it's 104 degrees; feels like 110

Not to put too fine a point on it, but in the words of our friend Sarah, "It's stinkin' HAWT!"

This is the time of year when you wonder why you still live in Austin - especially when you know that there are places where the high today will be 62 degrees. Give me a break! As much as possible, outdoor activity has ceased. No more gardening, trimming, or fixing. It can wait and I don't care what the neighbors think; they are all inside anyway. Even indoor projects, if they require going to the garage for tools are on hold. It's too hot. Close up the house. Pull the shades tight so the poor A/C at least has a chance of cycling before dawn!

Please. We really don't want to know how many days in a row the temperature has been in triple digits and the humidity above 75%, but that's all the weatherman has to talk about. What else is he going to say? We know what the forecast will be for the next too-many days! By the way, don't send me anything by snail mail. That requires walking out to the mail box and actually touching a metal object.


It's the reverse of being snowed in, but the results are the same - cabin fever.  Let's see, I could sort the newspapers in the recycling bin. Again. Wait! I can clean up my hard drive. Oh, yeah. I did that yesterday.

You know it's hot when...

The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
Hot water now comes out of both taps.
You can make sun tea instantly.
You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.
You discover that  it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.
You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.
You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
Potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.
Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.
A scalding hot shower still cools you down
People walking down the sidewalk spontaneously burst into flames
You wish you had gotten the cloth seats instead of leather
Your iPhone tells you it needs to cool down before use. Really.
You keep spare bottles of freon in your car.
You buy sun block by the case.
You start bonding with your air conditioner.
Your electric bill is higher than your house payments.
You start putting ice cubes in your water bed.
You keep your refrigerator open just to feel the cool air.
You cancel your Hotmail account because you didn't like the name of it.


How do you know that it's hot?