The first story took place in Abilene many years ago when we were helping with the Young Marrieds class at Highland. One year we had a class Halloween costume party at the office building where I worked. Pat, one of the co-teachers rented a gorilla suit, and as class members pulled up, he would lope out from around the corner of the building and greet them. A car pulled up, but at the house across the street, and a woman got out and went inside the house.
Pat didn't notice that part and loped out to find two very wide-eyed, very frightened kids in the back of the car, screaming for momma! Pat beat a hasty retreat and the mother came back to the car with the kids yelling that there was a gorilla! She drove away, whaling away on the kids in the back, telling them loudly, "I told you, and I told you, don't lie to me!" and the kids protesting just as loudly, "But Momma, we DID see a gorilla!"
So we are watching TV and there is a commercial by an orthopedics company touting how much better their artificial hip is than others and plastered across the screen is a label that says, "Prescription Required." Really? I have to have a prescription for an artificial hip? I can't just go to Wal Mart and pick one up and install it myself?
You know, if you can't score a ticket to the Super Bowl in Dallas, you can always shell out $200 and go stand on the parking lot of Jerry World with 20,000 of your closest friends and WATCH IT ON TV! That may sound like a lot, but you will get a game program, a bandanna, other neato stuff and get to watch Cowboy Cheerleaders strut their stuff, AND you will be counted in the official attendance, so you can proudly say, "Super Bowl XLV? Dude, I was there!"
And the concluding gorilla story is primo Austin weirdness. Check out the Austin Gorilla Run. Everyone in the race wore a full, head-to-toe gorilla costume to help raise awareness about the plight of the mountain gorilla. The entry fee ($99.95) covered a free gorilla suit for keeps (after your running 5K in the suit they don't want it back), lunch at an Irish Pub and an after party with live music. Proceeds benefited the Mountain Gorilla Conservation Fund, which works in Uganda, Rwanda and The Democratic Republic of Congo to train locals in becoming park rangers and veterinarians.
You can't make this stuff up, folks!
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